There were many wonderful contributions, including these two pieces of advice:
Ask (1) Does it matter? and then accept (2) It is awful, a decline to death, but enjoy the funny bits on the way.
And don't forget (a thought for carers) 'If you don't look after yourself, someone else has to'.
You may also want to look at this website with useful information (set up for thjose living in 3 cntral London Boroughs, but a lot of the information is useful to all). http://www.peoplefirstinfo.org.uk/